Glimpse
by tasha27
Summary: An L/J drabble Collection with the occasional Marauder thrown in.
1. Fight for me

**A/N: So these are all just little snippets that came to me and since I didn't know how to elaborate on them, or fit them into another story, I decided to start a drabble collection!**

_**Thanks to MissStarlett for betaing ALL of these!**_

**Fight for me.**

He distances himself from her.

She tells him that the only way he can have her is if he fights for her.

Fights for her like he used to.

He refuses to do it all again, his heart is already torn.

She tells him that if he really ever wanted her he'd fight for her.

Something breaks inside him, and he gives her a piece of his mind- saying that he has always loved her more than anything and that she was too blind to see it, always picking the wrong guys when he was there waiting for her.

He tells her one last time that she has lost her chance.

And that is when she gives up completely.

**A/N: This came to me oneday a while ago, and I just stumbled across it again today, and seeing as I couldn't fit it in anywhere, I decided to post it here!**


	2. TornFrayed

**Torn/frayed**

She's laying on her bed in the girls' dorm tears staining the sheets on her old bed. She knows she made a mistake.

The next morning at breakfast she looks for him, expecting his eyes on her. He doesn't look. She doesn't know how to react. In the seven years she's known him he has always looked. It is the first time in seven years that he hasn't.

She broke him. She picked Amos over him. And for what? Nothing. She could have been happy with Amos...but only if she had James too. She only wanted James as a friend; or so she thought. They were best friends bordering on lovers. He could see that...she could not. Until now. He had asked her to pick. Him or Amos...and she picked Amos. The minute she picked Amos she knew she made the wrong choice. She saw the life leave James.

It's the middle of the next week and still he doesn't meet her eyes. There is a constant hush, and even Sirius, Peter and Remus avoid her gaze. Hogwarts is strangely quiet without the Marauders doing what they do best. And it's all her fault.

She sits in class, and she sees how McGonagall has to do a double take when she realizes it is indeed the class with the Marauders and Lily, and that the tables are turned and its _Lily _trying to get James' attention.

The glow in his eyes is gone and his eyes don't follow her like they used to.

**Review please!**


	3. Glimpse

**Glimpse**

He sees a flash of red out of the corner of his eyes.

He thinks it's her and when he looks again, the red is gone.

He remembers all the plans and pranks that went into getting her to date his best mate.

And although nearly thirteen years has passed, he can still see a messy raven-haired boy with glasses and hazel eyes, running after a red headed beauty with emerald eyes.

And never has he missed James more.

**A/N: Let me know what you think?**


	4. Ache

**Ache**

He's gorgeous.

That's all you can think.

The ache in your gut and the burning behind your eyes proves it.

You want him more than you've ever wanted anyone else.

There's a catch.

You could've had him, but you missed your chance.

He moved on a long time ago.

But when he catches your eye, you're not so sure.

And that one look gives you hope.


	5. Finally

**(untitled)**

You told him last night.

Told him you loved him.

You ran after that, but he catches your arm and hugs you tight.

You breathe in his scent, maybe for the last time-after all, this could ruin your friendship.

He pulls away and says he has to think- that he'll see you tomorrow.

Tomorrow comes and you knock on his door. He answers and you don't meet his gaze when you he says 'hi'. He doesn't make you meet his gaze, instead he threads his fingers through yours and leads you up to his room.

"So..." you say, breaking the silence that has enveloped you.

Instead of answering, he presses his lips against yours.

Soon enough you're laying on his bed, being kissed like you've never been kissed before, and you push him away, just for a minute to breathe and tell him how much this- he- means to you.

And before you know it, you're enveloped by him again, in a tangle of moans, sheets, and limbs and you wouldn't have it any other way.


	6. Last Goodbye

**Last Goodbye**

Sirius is standing there in the door of our home in Godric's Hollow and he has that grin on his face as he waves goodbye, James smirking after him.

"Bye Lily, Harry, Prongs!"

"Bye Padfoot!"

And as Sirius flashes his smile one more time before dissapparating, I know that this is the last time we will see Sirius.

And the scary thought is, I can't imagine James without Sirius, but even worse, I can't see Sirius without James.

**A/N: What do you think? **


	7. Change

**Change**

It's strange, she thinks.

That you can have a person around you for so many years and only begin to appreciate them when there is only so much time left.

She starts to notice how he taps his foot during class.

How his hand runs through his soft looking hair.

How his smile graces his features when their eyes meet.

And today, she thinks, is a day for change.

A few minutes later, she notices how his rough stubble feels against her cheek.

She's glad of the change.

**A/N: Not too sure about this one. Wanted to post it anyways...review?**


	8. Taste

**Taste**

Taste, she thinks is the best out of the five senses.

She's tasted many things in her seventeen years.

Chocolate,

Marshmallows,

Honey,

And even dirt, from when Petunia pushed her off the swing set in their grandparent's backyard when she was five.

But out of all the things she's ever tasted,

James Potter's kisses were by far the best.

**A/N: Personally, I like this one alot. After **_How It All Started_**, my focus is to write a chapter fic on the five senses...chapter one is already started, so this is a bit of a hint. :) **_**Review?**_


	9. Echo

**Echo**

He's sitting in his office waiting for Severus to bring him the Wolfsbane potion when he looks down at the Marauders Map.

He sighs, as all the memories come flooding back, all their midnight trysts, all the pranks that caused so much laughter to ring through the halls.

Then he sighs again, hearing their laughter.

James, Sirius, and Peter.

He closes his eyes, picturing them in the Great Hall, Peter asking Sirius to pass the Potatoes, Sirius' grey eyes and barking laughter, and James, his golden hazel eyes and windswept hair as he looks down the Gryffindor table towards a beautiful red-headed girl.

He is brought back to the present when there is a knock at the door and he looks down at the map to see the dot labelled _Severus Snape_. A tear runs down his cheek and he taps the tattered parchment.

"_Mischief Managed."_

**A/N: Ugh, I feel like such a horrible person because I can't spit out Chapter 9 of**_** How It All Started! **_** On the bright side, at least this will tide you over a bit and I'm working on a oneshot too. Review?**


	10. Hogsmeade

**Hogsmeade**

He's sitting under the beech tree when he sees her approaching.

"What are you doing back so early? Thought you'd be out snogging Diggory." He smiles, but stops when he realizes it's a grimace.

She bites her lip and sighs, frustrated. "He's not what I expected."

He raises an eyebrow and before he can compose a reply he blurts

"And what did you expect?"

She shrugs her shoulders.

"I don't know."

"Well, let me know when you do."

A few minutes pass in silence and then she bites her lip again,

"Oh alright! I expected you!"

His hazel eyes meet hers and he chuckles.

She glares at him, but the glare is wiped off her face when his lips meet hers and he whispers,

"I hope the next Hogsmeade trip I live up to your expectations."

**A/N: I like this one, but I'm not too sure about the last line. What do you think?**


	11. Glow

**Glow**

She doesn't know it, but she glows when she's in his presence.

Mary watches them through the window and sighs, hoping that one day she'll glow in someone's presence.

They're perfect for each other,

His eyes hazel, hers emerald.

His hair ebony, hers crimson.

And when his tanned hand captures her pale one, she smiles up at him, glowing.

**A/N: I don't know if I like this one that much, but I couldn't bear to delete it, so here it is!**


	12. Glasses

**Glasses**

Glasses, she thinks, are geeky.

She's thought that ever since first year when she first met James Potter.

But when she steps onto Platform 9 ¾ in seventh year and sees him, things change.

Glasses aren't so geeky anymore.

Especially on James Potter.


	13. Azkaban

**Azkaban**

Azkaban, he thinks is one of the worst places in all of the wizarding world.

The worst of it though, isn't the Dementors, oh no.

It's not even the lack of laughter and happiness.

No, it's all the time spent with his thoughts and the pain of losing his best mate.

Thirteen years will never erase that.

When he thinks back to his years at Hogwarts, he remembers one weapon he still has against them all.

So the next day when the Daily Prophet announces Sirius Black's escape from Azkaban, he is running free, his grey eyes, and barking laugh _nearly_ as carefree as it was thirteen years ago.

As his paws pound the ground on the way to Hogwarts, he barks, laughing at how much James would've loved this.


	14. Grass

**Grass**

He always loved grass. It reminds him of sunny afternoons on the Quidditch Pitch and Lily Evans.

One of his first and favourite memories of grass is when he was in first year and Lily Evans was angry with him for hexing Snape. What surprised him most was that she didn't use her wand to get even with him. She curled her hand into a fist and punched him right in the face. She then continued to tackle him to the ground. When he got up, he had grass stains on his uniform.

As he looks at the beautiful red head sitting beside him six years later he chuckles remembering that day. She asks him what is so funny and he tells her. She apologizes and he says that he should be the one apologizing. She laughs brushing it off and pushes him back onto the grass under the beech tree...the same place where the fight took place...

And when her lips meet his in a heady kiss, he thinks that maybe, this is his favourite memory of grass...and that his first encounter is now in second place.

**A/N: This was a oneshot/drabble on its own before, but it made more sense to move it in here because it is a drabble collection. **


	15. First Kiss

**First Kiss/Stolen**

First Year

She had just been sitting there on the bench innocently reading her book. He had seen her numerous times since they first arrived at Hogwarts. Now more than ever she had caught his attention, and she hadn't even been doing anything remotely interesting.

As he watched her, pondering how best to get her attention, he came up with an excellent scheme.

o.O.o

"Hey, Evans!"

She looks up from her book, and her emerald eyes meet his. He is so mesmerized by her gaze that he almost trips over a rut in the ground.

"What would you like, Potter?" She doesn't say it in a rude way, just acknowledges him. He also senses curiosity in her tone.

"Could I show you something?" he asks with his hands stuffed in his pockets. His cheeks are slightly pink and he's avoiding her gaze.

"I don't see why not," she replies, and as his eyes meet hers, he sees that she is smiling at him.

"Good," is all he says as he grabs her hand and drags her towards the copse of trees nearby, leaving her book forgotten on the bench.

James stops once they come to a small clearing, and Lily gasps.

"Do you like it?" he asks. His hazel eyes are sparkling behind his wire rimmed glasses, and she smiles at him again.

"It's beautiful…. How did you find it?"

He disregards her question and replies, "It's not as beautiful as you."

He revels in the fact that he was able to make her turn that pretty shade of pink.

"You don't mean that," she replies, still avoiding his gaze.

"I do," he replies, and with that, he lifts her chin and plants a kiss lightly on her lips.

He pulls away to see her reaction and grins at the fact that her eyes are wide and

All she can breathe is,

"You stole my first kiss."

**A/N: This is another one that I decided to take off my stories page and put in here.**


	16. Of Secrets and Sortings

**Of secrets and Sortings**

She never told anyone what the Sorting hat said to her.

After getting off the Hogwarts Express, she had wanted so badly to be in Slytherin with Sev.

But then, something changed.

She remembers telling the hat

'_I want to be in Slytherin. Or at least anything but Hufflepuff.'_

And just as the hat was about to announce _'Ravenclaw' _she caught sight of _him. _He was standing in the crowd waiting to be sorted, and although his first impression was anything but good, she knew that there was something in his eyes as they met hers, that screamed _Gryffindor. _

'_Wait! No, is there any chance I am cut out for Gryffindor?' _

'_Ah, you are very clever, perfect for Ravenclaw, but you don't have the patience__for riddles and rhymes.'_

"_Better be, GRYFFINDOR!"_

She breathes a sigh of relief and makes her way to the Gryffindor table.

She smiles and makes friends with the blonde girl beside her, Mary McDonald, and when she hears _his _name, her breath catches in her throat praying she made the right choice.

"_Potter, James" _rings throughout the Great Hall and she relaxes in her seat as the hat calls out,

"_GRYFFINDOR!"_

o.O.o

So six years later, as she's sitting in the library next to James, and he asks, "How do you spend so much time in the library? You'd think the Sorting Hat made a mistake and put you in Gryffindor."

All she does is laugh and kiss him lightly on the mouth.

'_Maybe I'll tell you one day.'_

**A/N: A HUGE thanks to Maggie for betaing this!**


	17. Heartache

**Heartache**

He hates the feeling he gets when he's away from her.

It begins with a thought, followed by a sigh, and then with a dull ache in his chest where his heart is.

It throbs and when it becomes especially bad, he thinks he's having a heart attack.

He doesn't understand why love has to hurt so much.

He wishes he could be more like Padfoot, just going with the flow, and not waiting for someone special.

Her smile, her laugh, her eyes, and the way she puts her quill behind her ear when she's travelling between classes all make him love her more.

And adds to his heartache.

She walks by and flashes him a friendly smile and he returns it, the weight of his heartbreak gone.

But as soon as she's out of view, he sighs as the dull ache returns at the thought of her never being his.

**A/N: Thanks to Maggie for betaing this! **


	18. Married

**Married**

She can't believe she's married.

She's the happiest person alive today.

She's married to someone she never thought she'd love, but he is the most amazing man she has ever known.

She loves all his quirks and his dazzling smile.

Those hazel eyes that burn molten gold when he looks at her.

When he slipped that ring on her finger and she truly became his forever she beamed at him and he tousled his hair grinning right back.

And tonight she can't wait to fall asleep in his arms.


	19. Return

**Return**

The day he returns to Hogwarts hurts more than anything.

He's half expecting to see _her _walking down the hall with her mates.

Every time he turns a corner he expects to see a flash of auburn or emerald green eyes.

Or see Potter following her like a lost puppy.

And on September 1st when he sits at the Head Table and sees _her _green eyes looking back at him from a boy with messy jet black hair, he almost wishes he hadn't returned.

But he did.

He did it for _her_.


	20. Quidditch

**Quidditch**

For as long as he can remember he's been a chaser.

Not just in Quidditch, but in everyday life.

He's never really given much thought to the similarities between Quidditch and Lily Evans.

Not until now.

Her eyes are green like the Pitch; Her hair as red as the Quaffle.

And both can make his adrenaline pound through his veins like nothing else.

And he's never really noticed until now, how he chases her and chases her until he catches her, just like the seeker catches the snitch at the end of a Quidditch match.


	21. Barrier

**Barrier**

They've just had another row.

Only this time, it's over for good.

He climbs the stairs to the boys' dorms and doesn't look back.

She feels horrible, it shouldn't be this way.

But if he'd just _leave it alone_ for once and _let _her date someone else, she could make a better judgement.

The Common Room is deathly silent and when his door slams, the spell is broken and there has never been such a barrier between them.


	22. Realization

**Realization**

She's sitting in the Great Hall when she realizes she loves him.

It's right before the big Gryffindor versus Slytherin Quidditch match and she's sitting in her seat like every other morning talking to Mary and Alice and eating a piece of toast.

All the members of both Quidditch teams are already eating breakfast and the hall is buzzing with excitement.

Even Hufflepuff's and Ravenclaw's are sporting red for the occasion.

She's starting to get anxious because there is still no sign of him.

She's started tapping her foot and chewing her lip...things she only does when she's anxious.

And finally, she hears the doors of the Great Hall creak open and her head whips around so fast that she's surprised she hasn't gotten a crick in her neck. The hall, previously abuzz, is now deathly silent.

In he steps, his gorgeously tanned and toned body encased in leather, his jersey Gryffindor red and gold. His twinkling hazel eyes are a molten gold behind his wire-rimmed glasses and his trademark smirk is painted on his lips. His Shooting Star is clasped in his bronzed hand and now she finally sees why he is the god of Hogwarts.

He's everything.

He's cocky, arrogant, and selfish.

He's friendly, loving and confident.

He's troublesome, handsome, and every bit a Marauder.

And that is why she loves him.

**A/N: I've never dedicated anything to anyone before, but I would like to dedicate this drabble to Lili Evans dotcom. She has written and amazing story that has enthralled me, and without her, the James in this drabble definitely wouldn't be as utterly sexy as he is.**


	23. Number Twelve Grimmauld Place

**Number Twelve Grimmauld Place**

He hates it here, in this house of Slytherin.

He's trapped, caged, while everyone else is free to come and go.

He wishes everything would be red and gold instead of green and silver.

He misses home; he misses Hogwarts and James, Remus, Peter, and Lily, and being seventeen.

He misses being free, but most of all, he misses what it means to be a Marauder.


	24. Cloak

**Cloak**

"Quick! Filch is coming!" whispers Remus frantically.

"There's nowhere to go! Evans is on the other end of the hall; we're trapped!" utters Sirius.

"No we're not! Here!" says James pulling out his invisibility cloak.

"Where'd you get that?!" asks an awed Peter.

"It's a family heirloom, now let's move!"

They all crowd under the cloak and slowly approach the said Lily Evans.

_Crash!_

"Who's there?!"

"Ow Pete! Watch what you're doing!"

"Shh!"

"Potter! You and your mates better come out this instant!"

"Ah! I hear them now my pretty! String them up by their toenails we will!"

"Ahh-!"

"Potter?! Let go of me this instant! Ugh! And Pettigrew and Black!"

"Shh! Do you _want _Filch to catch you after curfew?!"

"Remus?"

"Er- they made me do it."

"You came up with the plan! Don't blame us!"

"Er- guys? Filch, remember?"

"Oh, right- here!"

"What-?"

"Shh!"

"It came from over here, my love. We will catch them don't you worry! Blasted miscreants!"

"..."

"Whew, finally, he's gone."

"Evans?"

"..."

"Evans? Why's your mouth stuck to James'?"

"It's not."

"Clearly it was."

"It's all _your_ fault!"

"How's it my fault?!"

"Because _you _came up with the plan!"

"Wouldn't have thought you'd believe Sirius."

"Yes, well, I didn't believe those third years either when they said Potter was a bloody good kisser."

"...and?"

"And what?"

"Am I a good kisser?"

"Bloody fantastic as far as I'm concerned."

"Excellent."

"Alright, well can we all please move? I'd like to get back to the dorm before dawn."

"Great plan Moony ol' pal."

"I thought so."

It's amazing what can happen under one little cloak.

**A/N: Turned out a little different than I imagined but I like it anyways! It's supposed to take place in first year although near the end things became a little less accurate...the cloak, the kiss and all...I like it all the same. Review? I'd LOVE to know your opinion!**


	25. Emerald

**Emerald**

He was destined for the colour emerald.

He met the love of his life and her eyes were emerald.

He was sorted into Slytherin; the house colours were _emerald _and silver.

The curse he died by was emerald in colour.

Emerald was his favourite colour.

**A/N: Thanks so much to **_MyMelo_** for betaing this!**


	26. Hazel

**Hazel**

She's reading Watership Down and the one rabbit's name is Hazel.

She eats hazelnuts at dinner that night.

She goes for a walk after dinner and she sees a stag.

His eyes are hazel.

She goes back to the Gryffindor Common room and there is James Potter with his mates.

He sees her and approaches her.

His eyes are hazel too.

Everywhere she goes she sees hazel.

It's all James Potter's fault.

**A/N: Thanks so much to **_MyMelo_** for betaing this!**


	27. Stay

**Stay**

They've become friends over the months and it isn't unusual for them to have sleepovers with his mates, so when she breaks up with Amos Diggory and wakes him up in the middle of the night, he doesn't mind.

She crawls into his bed and cuddles with him under the covers.

She doesn't know when exactly this became okay, but she doesn't really care because his hazel eyes, messy hair and warm naked torso are comforting.

They lay there in a comfortable silence and when she makes to leave, he asks her to stay.

**A/N: A HUGE thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing this!**


	28. Earmuffs

**Earmuffs**

"So what exactly are these earmuffs?" asks Sirius.

"They block out loud noises and protect your ears." Replies Lily. "Muggle farmers use them when they drive tractors."

"We should get some of those for when Padfoot decides to bring a banshee into the room."

"Hey! I resent that! What's a tractor?"

"It's not nearly as bad as Prongs and Lily. Never mind what a tractor is!"

"Hey! We always use a silencing charm!"

"Not the time you drank too much Firewhisky and were moaning 'Oh Lily, you're so-"

"ALRIGHT! I think we've all heard enough!"

"I forgot about that, sorry mates."

"Where can we get some of these?"

"I'll get you all some for Christmas yeah?"

"Er- could you make it sooner? Pete tends to get a bit excited when he sees the Sunshine Girl in the _Prophet._

"Do not!"

"Alright, alright. I've learned things I could've lived without! You'll get them before dinner on Friday."

"Excellent."

**A/N: Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing!**


	29. Eleven

**Eleven**

At eleven, boys aren't as fascinating as they are at fourteen.

But even then James Potter caught your eye.

His messy hair, geeky glasses, and utter naivety of the Muggle world catches your notice and you wonder whether or not you could ever be friends.

The next moment he turns your hair green because it matches your eyes and you decide that no, you could never be friends.

You shrug your shoulders and don't give it another thought because all the same, at eleven boys aren't as fascinating as they are at fourteen.

**A/N: A HUGE thanks goes to **_MyMelo _**for beta-ing!**


	30. Cornered

**Cornered**

The castle is silent and shadows dance across the stone walls of Hogwarts.

She has the feeling that she's being watched, but that could just be the many portraits dotting the walls.

She's on the seventh floor making her way back to the Head's Common room.

Before she knows it, her back is pressed against the cold stone and her mouth has been captured by soft warm lips.

Her captor moans and she barely hears it, but she can feel it rumble through his chest.

Her hands tangle in the soft jet black locks and he presses his body closer to hers, trailing kisses down her neck.

Their tryst is becoming more heated; her knee slides between his legs and he hisses, pulling away.

It's dark, but she can still make out the faint blush on his cheeks.

His hair is windswept and his hazel eyes are shining.

He's looking at her, hazel colliding with emerald and she can hear his panting.

"I'm sorry." He blurts, breaking the silence.

Normally she'd have something to say about him missing rounds, but after experiencing James Potter like this, it's all she wants to accomplish tonight.

**A/N: Thanks so much to **_MyMelo _**for betaing this! **


	31. Library

**Library**

She's thirteen and innocent and she loves the library.

She loves the smell of old books, polished wood, and the silence.

It's a Saturday and she looks out the window to where the Gryffindor Team is practicing Quidditch and smiles, thinking of James Potter and how he's out there twirling around in the air.

So she is shocked when the chair across from her is pulled away from the desk and she sees his hazel eyes in front of her.

"Alright, Lily?"

"Fine, yo- shouldn't you be at Quidditch practice?"

"Phillips knackered his arm; I had to take him to Pomfrey."

"Oh."

"What are you working on? You should be outside, it's wonderful out there!"

"Can't, McGonagall's Transfiguration essay is brutal and I'm nowhere near finished."

"I can help you if you want."

"Oh- okay."

She notices how he shifts his seat around the table so he is sitting next to her. He looks over her notes and the silence is comfortable.

"The second line down is incorrect. It should read..._the proper procedure to transfiguring a shoebox into a teacup is flicking your wand to the left twice, then right once."_

Before she knows it, half an hour has passed and her completed essay is on the table before her.

"There, all done." She looks up and sees him grinning at her.

She blushes and says, "Thanks a lot James, you saved my life!"

"It was nothing, but I've gotta go, Sirius will be back from practice by now."

"Oh, alright, see you later then."

She sees something in his eyes and before she knows what has happened,

James' lips brush against her cheek and then he's gone, headed out of the library.

She's thirteen and innocent and she loves the library; but she loves James Potter more.

**A/N: Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing!**


	32. Looking

**Looking**

He's looking at her; staring more like.

His hazel eyes burning molten gold behind his wire-rimmed glasses.

And when finally she decides to look back, emerald meeting hazel, sparks fly across the Gryffindor common room.

**A/N: Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing!**


	33. Tower

**Tower**

She's sitting up in the Astronomy Tower, thinking about the events of the previous day.

She feels empty, sad, betrayed.

She never thought Sev would say that word.

_Mudblood._

She should've seen it coming...it was only a matter of time.

There is a creak behind her.

"Who's there?"

"Evans?"

"Go away, Potter."

"Please, Evans, I just want to say I'm sorry."

She's shocked; James Potter has never apologized.

She doesn't answer, drinking it all in; the silence, his apology, and even her own thoughts.

The silence is comfortable. Not awkward as she thought it would be.

Despite losing her best friend, she thinks if James continues this, she'll have found a new one.

He approaches her slowly, and places his hand on hers.

She wants to pull it away, but it's cold up here in the tower and his hand is oh so warm.

"I really am sorry. He would've said it eventually."

She sighs. "I know."

She doesn't notice him at first coming closer, but when his lips brush her cheek and her nostrils are engulfed in his enticing scent, she decides she won't slap him tonight.

He turns to go and before he reaches the door she says,

"Try that again, Potter, and you'll be in St Mungos before you can say Quidditch."

She doesn't look, but she knows he has that grin plastered on his face.

"I'm counting on it Evans, I'm counting on it."

**A/N: Thanks goes to **_MyMelo _**for betaing!**


	34. Replaced

**Replaced**

They've had a row, which wouldn't be unusual if they weren't best friends.

She had overheard some fifth year Ravenclaw's talking about how James Potter had finally gotten over 'that redhead Evans' and she had taken points for spreading rumours.

The next day she went down to breakfast and saw them together; she avoided him as much as she could, chiding herself that she was only upset because they were best friends and _he _should've told her- she shouldn't have had to find out that way.

She was making her way to her room in the Head's dorms, when he came out of the bathroom with only a towel on, his ruffled hair messier than usual, causing water droplets to cascade down his gorgeous bronze body.

"Lily."

"Go away James, shouldn't you be out with your new girlfriend? What was her name? Oh right, Sadie."

She sees him falter for a moment, and tries to get away, but he grabs her arm.

"Who told you?"

"Obviously not you."

"Lily, please."

"What is there to say? I don't care who you date, but it would be nice if I could hear it from you."

"I didn't want you to know."

She looks at him outlandishly and her mouth opens and closes like a goldfish until his words sink in.

"Why?"

He sighs, running his hands through his hair.

"I just didn't, okay?"

She doesn't know why she does it, but once her hand hits his cheek, it's too late.

She runs to her room and throws herself onto her bed, tears cascading down her face.

She misses the look of heartbreak cross his face.

**A/N: A HUGE thanks to **_MyMelo_** for being such a great beta!**


	35. Fall

**Fall**

Summer was always his favourite season.

Summer meant ice cream at Florene Fortesque's, swimming, and of course, Quidditch.

Summer is only his second favourite season now.

It has been replaced by fall.

Fall is now his favourite season, because he just watched Lily Evans jump in a pile of leaves.

Her hair matches the leaves and now, she has become his eternal fall.


	36. Snow

**Snow**

She loves snow; how there is a blanket of white surrounding the Hogwarts grounds and the peacefulness of it all.

She loves making snowmen and snow angels, and even having snowball fights with the Marauders and the rest of Gryffindor tower.

But most of all, she loves snow because the cold gives her an excuse to feel _his_ warm body pressed up against hers.

She doesn't know how much longer she can survive this; just being friends.

**A/N: Thanks so much to **_MyMelo_** for beta-ing! :D**


	37. Butterbeer

**Butterbeer**

The first time he tries butterbeer, he's thirteen and on a date with Marlene McKinnon.

It's cold outside, and when he takes a sip it warms him all the way down to his toes.

He's fifteen and Lily Evans has just told him she'd rather date the Giant Squid.

He knows it's strange, but he has a tingling warm sensation in his stomach.

He's seventeen and has finally gotten a date with Lily Evans.

He's waiting impatiently and he's afraid she won't show.

The bell rings as the door to the Three Broomsticks opens and in walks Lily Evans.

She looks radiant, and he feels the warmth in his stomach as she approaches him smiling.

"Hey,"

"Hey, what would you like to drink?"

"Butterbeer sounds good."

He waves Rosmerta over and when she asks if he'd like a butterbeer too, he says,

"No thank you."

He's already had his.

**A/N: Thanks to MyMelo for betaing!! I posted two today because I won't be posting for the next few days because I have Christmas stuff going on. So, Merry Christmas! **


	38. Lie

**Lie**

"I don't love you anymore."

Her smile shatters and he has to grit his teeth so that he doesn't break with it.

"Wha-"

"Surely you know that I can't wait forever? I've waited six years and now when I'm dating Marlene you tell me you want me?"

She lets out a sob and runs as fast as she can away from him. Only once she has turned the corner does he allow his pain to show.

She doesn't know that he had to lie through his teeth to say that.

**A/N: Thanks to MyMelo for beta-ing. I know, I know, it's Christmas time, and I posted a sad one. Forgive me? **


	39. Drunk

**Drunk**

They're at the Three Broomsticks on a Saturday night partying.

Sirius is on the dance floor with three girls, Remus and Mary are dancing, and Pete is even chatting up a girl at the bar.

He, on the other hand is taking care of Lily. She had been avoiding him lately and hadn't wanted to come with them, but Mary had forced her, saying she would have a good time.

She grudgingly accepted and now here they were. They had been having a conversation on Nargles, which would be a strange topic if Lily Evans hadn't been plastered.

She was currently downing another shot of Firewhiskey.

"Er, Lily- I think you've had enough for one night."

"Oh don't be a party pooper, James! Here! Have another drink!"

"C'mon, let's get you back to the castle."

He has his arm around her waist and after she had fallen a second time he told her he'd give her a piggy back.

He continues on his way when she says,

"I don't think your girlfriend would like this very much."

"I'm helping a friend. There's nothing to be jealous about."

"Just the same, could you please put me down?"

He sighs, obliging her and just as she sways on her feet, his arms are around her and when her emerald orbs meet his so innocently he does something he really shouldn't.

He kisses her.

Her lips are soft against his and she tastes like firewhisky.

The kiss only lasts for a moment, but the fire burning through his veins proves that he's been kissing all the wrong girls.

"Wha-"

"Now, _that's _something to be jealous about."

**A/N: Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for beta-ing! So, turns out I did have some time to post today! So, MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! :D Review just because its Christmas and a time for giving?**


	40. Spotlight

**Spotlight**

There are many reasons why Severus hates James Potter.

He is wealthy, suave, and handsome.

He is talented, popular, and everything he wants to be.

He has the girl of his dreams, and mates that would do anything for him.

James Potter has the world at his fingertips.

But the reason Severus hates him the most, is that him and his Marauder friends were always in the spotlight.

**A/N: As always, a huge thanks to **_MyMelo_** for beta-ing!**


	41. Lake

**Lake**

She can see him out there, standing by the lake, his bronzed hand tangled in his unruly hair; the Giant Squid waving his tentacles in the air.

She decides to go for a walk, and once she's outside, she makes her way towards him.

There is a light breeze and it carries his voice towards her, his deep baritone making her think of how much he has matured, physically and mentally in the seven years she has known him.

He hasn't noticed her yet, but she can hear what he is saying now.

"I thought after fifth year I could win her over, you know? Looks like you've won, mate."

"The Giant Squid is going to be disappointed you lied to him."

He turns around to face her, shock written across his face, his hazel eyes boring into hers behind his wire-rimmed glasses.

"What?"

"I said, he didn't win."

He is still shocked, so she slowly approaches him and tangles her hands in his hair, pulling him down to meet her lips. She can feel his stubble underneath her fingertips and his hands on her waist, pulling her closer.

His kiss is tentative at first, until it finally sinks in who he is snogging and then it becomes rough and searching and he is putting all his emotions into this kiss.

She pulls away slowly and he is panting, his hair mussed and his hazel eyes are smouldering.

"The Giant Squid has _nothing _on you."

**A/N: As always, thanks goes to **_MyMelo_** for beta-ing! Oh, and I hope everyone had an excellent Christmas!**


	42. Socks

**Socks**

It's a Monday morning, and he's sitting on the couch in the Head's common room finishing his Transfiguration essay.

It's become a habit of his, to wait for Lily before they go to class together. He's elated that they've progressed to the friends stage, and he enjoys her company immensely.

On this particular morning, she is running late and he chuckles as he hears her rushing around her room.

Just then her bedroom door bangs open and she sprints into the room with only a towel on, her hair mussed and cheeks flushed.

He clears his throat and her head whips around.

"Looking for something?"

"Oh, sorry James, I've misplaced my socks and can't find them and class is in fifteen minutes!"

"Er- don't you have any other socks? I could lend you some of mine."

"Yes, of course I have other socks! But these are my lucky socks and I need them to pass the Transfiguration quiz!"

"Well, have you tried summoning them?"

"Oh, right, I didn't think about that." Her cheeks flush a pretty rose and he swallows the lump that has formed in his throat.

"_Accio socks._"

The socks zoom out from her bedroom and her face flushes again.

"I'll just be going now, I'll see you in a bit then, yeah?"

"Yeah." He says, and as soon as her bedroom door closes, he dashes to their shared bathroom for a cold shower.

She doesn't know it, but he is utterly confused at why Lily Evans finds it necessary to look for her socks with only a towel on.

**A/N: Thanks to MyMelo for beta-ing! **


	43. Brush

**Brush**

It's been three years since Hogwarts, but no matter where he is:

Diagon Alley.

Hogsmeade.

Playing Quidditch.

He can still feel the brush of her hand against his, and the fire burning in his veins, as if he had seen her just yesterday.


	44. Tree

**Tree**

She remembers that day clearly.

She remembers the rustle of the leaves, as the breeze passes through the branches.

She remembers hearing laughter from the other students at Hogwarts, as they were out enjoying the sunshine.

She remembers the Giant Squid in the background, his tentacles waving in the air.

She remembers his hazel eyes twinkling behind his wire-rimmed glasses and how for once he wasn't flanked by his mates.

She remembers thinking that he was up to no good, especially considering that they were the only two near the beech tree.

She remembers him dropping down on one knee; asking her to marry him.

She remembers accepting, and the feel of the bark against her back as he stood, pressing himself as close to her as he could.

She remembers fifth year; screaming that she'd rather date the Giant Squid.

That one tree held most of her memories; good or bad.

Mostly good.

**A/N: HAPPY NEW YEARS EVE!! :D Thanks to** _MyMelo_ **for beta-ing!**


	45. James

**James**

He is everything she has ever wanted, his unruly black hair sticking up all over the place.

His voice causes her to melt in his presence, no longer the high pitch of a boy, but now the deep baritone of a man.

His form is no longer lanky, but toned and bronzed from hours of Quidditch, and the rough stubble that graces his features makes her think things she shouldn't during class.

Like how its rough texture would feel against her own skin, as he kisses down her body.

When his hand flies to tangle in his already unruly hair, she focuses on his large calloused hand and wonders how her small one would feel in his.

She loves his smirk, but more than that, she loves the smile he reserves for her, the smile that is knowing, but at the same time, a shy little boys smile.

When he wears his uniform shirt unbuttoned at the collar, she catches sight of his collarbone, and for some unknown reason, she finds it gives her pleasure.

It also sends her mind into a dizzy whirlwind, imagining herself kissing down his body.

When he writes during class, his muscles flex and she takes in his broad shoulders and slim waist; and when she sees him sucking on the end of a sugar quill, all she wants is to be that sugar quill.

His laugh is contagious, and even if he's down the hall and she hears it, she finds herself chuckling, wondering what he has found so funny.

He smells like Heaven. She doesn't know if heaven even has a smell, but she's sure that if it did, it would smell like James Potter.

She loves how he is so cocky, friendly, loyal, brave, sexy, and such a _Gryffindor._

Before she fell in love with him, his eyes were just brown. Slowly, they became hazel, but now, now his eyes burn a molten gold.

She's known him for so long, but all the same, she doesn't know him at all.

He is an enigma, and she can't get enough of him.

**A/N: I couldn't help it. I had to write one that centered on James. I tried to describe him in the sexiest way possible. I hope I did him justice. Thanks goes to **_MyMelo_** for beta-ing!**


	46. First

**First**

"Pafoo."

"Prongs! Prongs, did you hear that?! Harry just said his first word!"

"I heard it Padfoot! Lily's going to be so pleased when she gets home!"

"He's a natural Marauder, that one."

"James, I'm home! How's Harry, not too much trouble was he?"

"He wasn't a problem Lils! He said his first word!"

Lily scoops Harry into her arms and smiles, looking at her son.

"What did you say, Harry? Can you say it again for mummy?"

Harry giggles, pointing at Sirius.

"Pafoo! Pafoo!"

Sirius' grin is wiped off his face when Harry is thrust into James' arms and the _Daily Prophet _is grasped in her hands, her face murderous.

"Sirius!"

"Ow! He needs to know his uncle Padfoot!" explains Sirius, rubbing the spot on his head where Lily walloped him with the paper.

"Yes, but there's time for that! And not for his first words!"

"Lils, honey, come on, I mean, Padfoot is always here anyways; at least we know Harry knows who's watching him when we're away."

Lily sighs,

"I suppose you're right."

"Pafoo! Pafoo!" says Harry bouncing in James' arms.

Sirius laughs, looking at James and James grins back.

"At least you haven't taught him to ride a broomstick yet." Mutters a grateful Lily.

"Well...you remember that time when you were away..."

"_SIRIUS!!!_"

"Er- I guess I'll be going now, see you later Prongs, Harry, Lils!" says Sirius, as he apparates with a _pop!_ just before Lily reaches him.

"I'm going to _kill _him!"

"Now, now Lils, don't be hasty...if he's going to be as good a Quidditch player as his dad, then he has to start practicing early."

"_James._"

"Er- I'll just be going this way..." he says, holding his hands up and backing out of the room.


	47. Routine

**Routine**

Everything had always been so _routine_ with them.

He'd provoke her, she'd retaliate, and on and on it went for five years.

Then, they came back from summer holidays, and things had changed.

He'd been nice to her, and soon, the year had passed in a blur.

They wrote to each other, over the summer, and it came as no surprise when they had to spend hours together patrolling and doing other Head duties in their seventh year.

Things became routine again; they'd meet up in the Head's dorms and talk, and then they'd go into their separate rooms, only to meet in their shared bathroom to brush their teeth.

Then, the routine was broken again, she had come out of the shower one morning; he had been brushing his teeth, and when she stepped out, not knowing he was there, she screamed and slipped.

He dropped his toothbrush and went to help her, trying not to look at her, naked, in front of him.

"I'm --er –sorry; I didn't know you'd be coming out so soon. Most girls take forever in the shower." He's tripping over his words, averting his eyes and she sucks in a breath when his eyes finally meet hers. They're no longer hazel, but a burning molten gold.

"Well, I'm not most girls and how would you know that anyway?" She asks, a bit harshly, trying to cover up her embarrassment.

Well-er -once Marlene spent the night and showered and took forever." He helps her up off the floor.

"Oh." She's looking at the floor now. She doesn't want to hear about the other girls he's slept with, and really, she doesn't know why she cares.

"She-- er -- she wasn't as beautiful as you." He's hesitant and she doesn't know where the suave Head Boy has gone. "Or—erm-- make me want to..."

"To what, James." She looks up at him; She's particularly curious now.

He doesn't answer her, instead, he fuses his mouth to hers, pulling off his shirt revealing a gorgeous bronze toned body, fumbling with his pants, and pushes her back into the shower.

Everything had always been so _routine_ with them; tonight, was everything but.

**A/N: I don't think this is rated M but let me know. I will have a few M rated drabbles thrown in here later on though, so I'm just going to mention it now, that there will be an Authours Note at the top warning you. The first is called 'Moment' and it goes on for three chapters after that, all respectfully titled 'Moment parts 2-4'. They will all be rated M so I most likely won't state that at the top of all four, but I'm just sending out a warning ahead of time.**


	48. Halloween

**Halloween**

James answers the door, and before he yells for her to run, she already knows it's _him_.

She's running up the stairs, the green light flashing on the wall, and that's when she knows James is gone forever.

She feels the tears running down her face and she wants to die too, but first she has to protect Harry.

Harry needs to be safe—for James.

He's telling her to step aside, and she won't.

She has to protect Harry.

But it's so _hard_, when she knows her heart has died with the man downstairs.

She's pleading, knowing that he won't listen, and as much as she loves Harry, without James, she wouldn't be able to go on.

Who would teach him Quidditch? James was the best on the team.

"_Step aside, girl_."

"_No, please, please not Harry!_"

"_AVADA KEDAVRA!_"

She sees the green light shooting towards her; she sees Harry, lying in his crib, and then she sees James, laughing so carefree, his hazel eyes shining and a hand tangled in his hair.

She lets out her last breath, Harry hearing it in his dreams, eleven years later.

"_Harry!_"

But what he doesn't hear, is her very last word, just a breath in the air;

"_James._"

**A/N: I HAD to write this piece. I read a fic recently, and in it, Lily let Snape kiss her, so I had to write this to show that Lily loved James so completely, and that there was never any doubt of her love for him. It definitely made me feel better lol.**


	49. Nightmare

**Nightmare**

He's patrolling the corridors, searching for someone.

He passes a window and sees the full moon bright in the sky.

He thinks he should meet Moony, but wait, no, that isn't right, Moony isn't the one he's looking for.

He continues on his way, making his way towards the seventh floor.

He hears someone behind him, but before he can turn all the way, his back is pressed against the stone wall of the corridor and his lips have been captured.

He can feel her body against his, her breasts pressing into his chest, her hands in his hair. He wraps her arms around her and when he breaks away, her emerald eyes meet his.

"_Lily,_"

As soon as he breathes her name, he wishes he hadn't.

Her eyes widen and she runs, he chases after her, only to find himself in the middle of the Quidditch Pitch, all of Hogwarts laughing at him as Lily Evans rejects him.

He's running now, twigs breaking under his feet as he ploughs through the forbidden forest.

He stops, his lungs burning in his chest, and when he looks up, Snape is standing in front of him.

His dark eyes are mocking him as he raises his wand, and breathes the words,

"_Avada-_"

He wakes up, panting, soaked in sweat and he runs a hand through his damp hair.

He gets out of his bed, hearing the snores and breathing of his mates and quietly opens the door.

He reaches the common room and lies down on the couch in front of the fire, letting it lull him to sleep.

When he wakes in the morning he's not sure if he dreamt it or not, but he swears he felt someone kiss him in his sleep.

**A/N: Thanks to MyMelo for betaing this! The next four chapters will be rated M, so if you prefer not to read them, I'm warning you now! **


	50. Moment

**A/N: Please note that this drabble is RATED M! **

**Moment**

She's in the corridor, his body pressed flush against hers, her hands tangled in his messy hair.

His scent is intoxicating and she wonders whether or not Benjy will notice when she meets him at dinner.

His mouth is hot on hers, his tongue twirling with hers, and she never wants this to end.

She can feel his moans rumbling in his chest, and his body is so _warm_.

She can feel his arousal pressing against her, and his shirt is undone three buttons, tie loose around his neck, his cheeks flushed, and eyes molten gold.

"Merlin, Lily," he manages to growl, his voice deep and husky.

She can feel his broom calloused hands cupping her face now, something he does every time before their tryst comes to an end.

He pulls back, her face still in his hands, and she looks up at him, drinking him in, so that when she returns to her room in the Heads tower after dinner, she can finish what they started, using her fingers.

**A/N: This was originally only going to be a single drabble, but I couldn't stop writing for it, so there will be a part two, three and four to this which will also be rated M. I've thought about not posting it because it is rated M, but I hope you liked it anyway. Please review.**

**I'm having major second thoughts about posting the other three parts to this, so I might just scrap them all together and leave it at this. They do get significantly more graphic.**


	51. Moment Part II

**A/N: Again, this chapter is rated M. **

**Moment Part: 2**

Each night after their trysts he hears her come in, and go to her room.

He enters their shared bathroom and sits by her door, elbows resting on his knees, head back against the wall.

He doesn't know why he puts himself through this, letting her have him whenever she wants, in dark corridors, but never being able to have _all_ of her.

He sits there, listening to her pleasure herself, her moans quiet so as not to let him hear her, if he was in his room.

He shuts his eyes, imagining her body writhing under his, and when she comes, he hears her moan his name softly.

He gets up from the floor and strips down, turning on the shower, hoping to rid himself of his arousal and trying to forget that she's dating Benjy, and using _him_.

**A/N: I got out of class early today, so here's an early update. Part 3 will be posted tomorrow!**


	52. Moment Part III

**A/N: This chapter is rated M, but I'm sure you already knew that! Sorry for the delay guys, I was really busy yesterday and couldn't find time to post. Without further ado, here's the next instalment! **

**Moment part: 3**

She often wonders when she hears the shower running, whether or not he's wanking off.

She can imagine his gorgeous bronzed body underneath the torrent of water.

She wonders what it would be like to_ be _a drop of water running down his body.

She can imagine his hand working furiously, as he imagines he's inside her.

She can hear his groans in her mind, and how it feels as it rumbles through his chest.

She wants to know what it feels like, having his fingers inside her, and how good he most likely is with them.

She wants to know what his arousal feels like—not against her, like usual—but inside her.

She wants to taste him, and have him come in her mouth, his hands tangled in her hair.

She wants to know what it would feel like having him on top of her and inside her, and just to be immersed in him.

She wants more than what they have now—just snogs and touches in a dark corridor before dinner.

**A/N: GrowingHope, there might be, but I'm not too sure yet!**


	53. Moment Part IIII

**A/N: Rated M! So, I couldn't wait to post the final chapter and decided to give it to you guys early lol. Enjoy!**

**Moment Part: 4**

It's after dinner after one of their trysts and he can't take it any longer.

He knows she's in her room pleasuring herself and he mutters _alohomora _and opens the door to her room.

He takes her in, lying on her bed, naked, hand cupping her breast and tweaking her nipple, while her other is buried in her curls, thumb rubbing clit, and fingers delving inside her.

Her eyes are shut, head thrown back, soft pants and moans emitting from her mouth, and he approaches her.

"Lily," he says, softly, his voice hoarse.

Her eyes snap open in horror as they see him standing there.

"James, what the bloody hell are you doing here?!" she blurts, hurriedly trying to cover herself with her blankets.

"I came to tell you that I can't do this anymore."

"Do what?" her cheeks are flushed at being caught in such a position.

"I can't—" he sighs, tangling a hand in his unruly hair, "I can't keep meeting you in dark corridors for quick snogs. I want you, Lily. I want you all to myself—all of you."

She looks down, unable to meet his eyes for a moment, but when she looks up, she's smiling shyly.

"Well, that won't be a problem anymore."

He's confused.

"I broke up with Benjy today," She continues. "Right after dinner, I couldn't stay away from you any longer. I want you too."

He's grinning at her confession and he jumps onto her bed, crushing her mouth to his. She's tugging at his clothes and finally he's free, and her skin against his is so _soft_.

They're both in heaven, a tangle of tongues, moans and gasps.

He's kissing her, and touching her, and he's inside her, and her mind is a whirl of happiness and pleasure and _James_.

He's rocking above her, burying himself deep inside her, and he's in complete bliss as he watches her writhing underneath him.

She's beautiful, and he's gorgeous and everything is just a whirlwind of emotion, pleasure and of Lily and James.

**A/N: Well, this mini drabble series is finally complete. Thanks to those that reviewed! I hoped you liked them! **_PinkPearl89 _**wrote an amazing oneshot based off of this mini drabble series and did an excellent job, so go read and review that! Next chapter will go back to the usual T rating.**


	54. Gryffindor

**Gryffindor**

It takes her a while to figure out why she was sorted into Gryffindor, while Sev was sorted into Slytherin; but now she sees that she was never meant to be in Slytherin, and he was never meant to be in Gryffindor.

She looks down Gryffindor table and catches James' eye. He smiles at her and she smiles back.

That, she realizes, was the difference all along.

Slytherin is darkness; Gryffindor is the light, and just like Gryffindor, James is the light in her life.


	55. Popsicle

**Popsicle**

It's the summer before their seventh year.

A week ago, she had received a letter stating that she was Head Girl and James Potter was Head Boy. At first she didn't know what to think, but he had sent a friendly enough letter asking her to meet him in Diagon Alley.

They're at Flourine Fortesque's and she is eating a chocolate frog sundae while he's licking an orange popsicle.

He's talking to her, only pausing to lick his popsicle, and she's finding it hard to pay attention, with his tongue flicking out like that, licking the melting treat.

How could she not have noticed before how utterly sexy he is, with his tousled hair, and toned body?

And that _tongue_.

She can't believe she wasted six years hating him, and in the two hours since they had met, he had made her laugh enough to make up for all those years.

He's talking again, but she's lost to his words, in awe.

"Er—Lily?"

She snaps out of her reverie and feels her face burn. He smiles at her and she can't meet his eyes.

"Sorry, er—continue," she mutters.

He's silent for a moment, and she glances at him, looking at her.

"Oh, sod it." He exclaims, leaning across the table and pressing his mouth to hers.

His lips are warm on hers, but she can feel the coolness on his tongue from his popsicle.

He pulls away, and she can still taste his orange popsicle in her mouth. He's avoiding her gaze and she's grinning,

"You know," she begins, "If this is what it's going to be like in the Head dorms this year, I'm very much looking forward to it."

She watches him process her words, the grin spreading across his face. He gets up, grabbing her hand and as they walk along the cobblestone street in their new found friendship, their ice creams lay forgotten on the table, melting in the afternoon sun.

**A/N: Sorry for such a long wait, guys. I just wasn't in the mood for writing. This is what I came up with, I hope you liked it! Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing! :)**


	56. Intoxicated

**Intoxicated**

It's only been two months since she last saw him, but already in that time, she knows he's changed.

The platform is crowded, families rushing to say their goodbyes as the whistle blows signalling the departure, but still people part for him as if he was Merlin himself.

As he approaches, she catches his laughter through all the noise and her eyes take in his glorious smile, toned body, and golden eyes.

He's grown taller, his messy hair longer, and stubble now graces his jaw.

She doesn't know where these inappropriate thoughts are coming from, and she is stunned when he says,

"Hey, Lily." As he brushes past her with his mates in tow as they board the train.

Her breath catches in her throat and by the time she is able to articulate,

"Hey, James."

He's already gone.

They haven't even left the platform and already James Potter has gotten under her skin. But this time, she thinks, it's not so bad.

**A/N: Sorry guys for such a long wait. Honestly, RL has been crazy lately! Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing!! **


	57. Intoxicated Part II

**Intoxicated Part: 2**

Two months has passed since he's been on the platform and already his eyes are searching for _her_.

The platform is crowded, families rushing to say their goodbyes as the whistle blows, signalling the departure, and people part for him as he makes his way towards the scarlet steam engine.

Peter trips over a luggage cart and Sirius scolds him for 'making the Marauders look foolish' and he laughs, shaking his head at Sirius' behaviour.

They're nearing the train when he catches sight of her. Her auburn hair is shoulder length now, in curls, (just the way he likes it) and her emerald eyes don't do his imagination justice.

He's getting closer and he can feel his throat closing, not sure if he should say something or not. His brain freezes and just as he walks past does his brain begin to function again, and he just manages to choke out,

"Hey, Lily." As he boards the train with his mates in tow.

He's not sure if he imagined it or not, but he thinks she might have used his first name.

**A/N: Here's the companion piece to Intoxicated! I hope you guys liked it! Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing!! **


	58. Interruption

**Interruption**

She's in the corridor, waiting for Slughorn to arrive and open the door to the potions room.

She's discussing her previous class with Alice and Mary; the rest of the Gryffindors a little ways away, glaring at the Slytherins.

She vaguely notices that the Marauders are present, minus James.

Alice is enlightening them with her date from the previous day with Frank Longbottom, when out of nowhere, James Potter is standing in front of her, muttering a quick,

"Excuse me."

The next minute, all she knows is James' lips on hers, her back against the stone wall of the dungeons, his hands cupping her face, and the Gryffindors whistling and cheering in the background.

He breaks away, panting, and she can feel her face heat up.

"Sorry, couldn't help myself."

She looks down at her feet and mutters,

"'S'okay, I don't mind."

He beams at her, and she looks up, beaming back.

"Excuse me, excuse me, sorry for being late, had to get some more crystallized pineapple, I misplaced mine. Good thing I always keep some extra in my office! Can never have enough, you know!" says Slughorn, bustling through the crowd.

As they make their way through the door and into the class, James leans down and whispers in her ear,

"Would you be mad if I told you I misplaced his sweets?"

She laughs at his brashness, and replies,

"I'll let you get away with it this time."


	59. Snitch

**Snitch**

She's sitting by the lake with her mates Alice and Mary, dipping her feet into the water as they watch the Giant Squid.

She's lost to their idle chatter until Alice points out the Marauders lounging in the shade by the beech tree, shirts lying in the grass beside them.

"Oh, yum, look at Sirius' pecks; how I wouldn't want to taste those!" exclaims Mary giggling at the look of horror on Lily's face.

"Mary! That's revolting! You can't be traitoring over to their side!"

"Oh, c'mon Lils, you have to admit, the Marauders _are _the most stunning blokes at Hogwarts!" says Alice, defending Mary. "Well, Frank is the most striking to me, but that's beside the point."

"_See_, Lil? I mean, how lucky are we? The three most dazzling boys at Hogwarts are in Gryffindor!"

"Correction, _two_ hottest, after all, Potter's more of a troll," She says, wrinkling her nose.

"Don't be daft, Lil, he beats Sirius on the sexy scale." Says Mary matter-of-factly.

"Oh for Merlin's sake! How can you think he's sexy, when he's constantly playing with that bloody snitch?!"

"Don't lie, Lils, you know you want to find out if he's really that good with his hands off the Pitch." Declares Alice, wriggling her eyebrows.

Her cheeks flame at Alice's suggestion and her only reply is "Bugger off."

She sneaks a glance over at the boys under the beech tree and when she sees Potter catch the snitch elegantly, she can't help but wonder if he really _is_ talented off the Pitch.

**A/N: Thanks to MyMelo for betaing! Sorry for the long wait guys, real life is so hectic and is going to get even worse over the summer! Thanks for bearing with me!**


	60. Element

**Element**

Fire and Ice have always been polar opposites, and for the longest time, Lily Evans was sure that she was the fire and _he_ was the ice.

James Potter, of course.

Sparks always flew when they were together, but now, things have changed.

She realizes that _he _is the fire and _she_ the ice, and it was only a matter of time before he melted her heart.

**A/N: Thank you to **_MyMelo_** for betaing! **


	61. Panic

**Panic**

He's done it again.

Thrown his heart out there to be trampled on; he can feel the panic rising in his chest as she takes him in, her mouth parted in surprise.

She licks her lips, the torches on the wall of the dungeons causing a shine over her soft skin.

She's not answering and his heart is sinking and he needs to get away before the tears rise any further. His throat is closing in and his breathing is becoming ragged.

"Right, well, I suppose I should go." He manages to choke out.

He's almost at the door, just a few more steps until he can escape and possibly breathe again.

"Wait."

His heart stops in his chest. Did he imagine it?

He turns slowly on his heel and sucks in a breath when he sees she's only a breath away.

"Yes—yes, I will go to Hogsmeade with you."

The weight has been lifted from his chest and he can breathe again and he's so elated that when her arms wrap around him he crushes her to his chest, smiling, the panic gone.

**A/N: As always, a HUGE thanks to**_ MyMelo_** for betaing!**


	62. Potter

**Potter**

_Potter._

Always _Potter_, never James.

He wonders what it would be like to hear the word _James_ roll off her tongue. The thought makes him groan and he tangles a hand in his already messy hair. He shouldn't be thinking these thoughts during Transfiguration; McGonagall would have his head if she knew.

The bell rings and as everyone scrambles out of the class on their way to lunch, he bumps into someone.

"So sorry, I should have been watching where—"

Oh.

"It's all right, I was lost in thought."

"Well, I have to go; Marlene will have eaten everything if I'm late. See you around, James."

James.

She called him _James._

Maybe things will be different; he needs to find Padfoot...or not, last time Padfoot was involved things didn't go well...Moony then; yes, he'll know what to do.

**A/N: Thanks to MyMelo for betaing!! **


	63. Harry

**Harry**

"_Hello, Tom, it's been a while." Says a messy-haired youth with hazel eyes._

"_Mr. Potter! What can I get you?"_

"_Nothing today, Tom. Just passing through to pick up Lily."_

-x-

The bell on the door tinkles, signalling more customers. Tom looks up from the dirty rag in his hand and almost drops the glass he's holding.

There in the doorway, flanked by a red-headed boy and bushy-haired girl is none other than James Potter.

No, it can't be, Tom thinks sadly. James Potter is gone.

The hair, though...

And when the messy haired boy in the middle meets his gaze, Tom does drop the glass.

And as it shatters, he thinks,

'Welcome back Mr. Potter, welcome back.'

**A/N: I came across this piece that I wrote a while back and decided to throw it in here because it is essentially Tom remembering James. Sigh, such a sad thought! Thanks to **_MyMelo _**for betaing!**

**PS- Dear **_growinghope_**, Thank you so much for all your reviews, and no worries, your reviews aren't repetitive; I really appreciate them and always want to reply, so here goes. THANK YOU!! :)**


	64. Pudding

**Pudding**

Pudding was always a favourite treat of hers.

When she was younger she loved the preparation and excitement of helping her mum and Petunia make it.

Later, she loved it because it helped her through break ups and fights, but now, now she loves pudding for a whole _other_ reason.

She had been waiting in the Heads common room for James to come in from Quidditch practice, and when he strolled in covered in mud from head to toe, she suggested pudding.

He chuckled and agreed that after his shower he'd join her for a pudding 'date'.

By the time he reappeared, water running down his bare chest, she had already started into the pudding.

"You started without me?!" he asked with mock outrage as she burst into laughter.

"Well, I would've waited, but you take _forever _in the shower, Mr. Potter."

"It was only fifteen minutes at most!"

"Mmm, possibly, but you know how I am with pudding."

He had opened his mouth to defend himself further, but before he could, she had shoved a chocolate pudding covered finger into his mouth.

"Mmm," he moaned, licking it off her finger. "Wow, that's good pudding."

She could feel her face burning, and to hide the fact, she smeared pudding on his chest.

"Bloody hell, woman! I just had a shower!"

"Whoops, guess I missed your mouth." She had said, laughing.

They had wrestled both ending up covered in chocolate pudding. He was hovering over her, and she had grabbed his hand and licked some of the creamy pudding off his finger.

He let out a groan and she saw him wince and mutter,

"_Shit._"

Her face was ablaze and she had avoided his gaze saying,

"Sorry."

"No, it's okay, my fault really, I haven't been shagged in a while, its catching up to me."

She had pulled him down then, and kissed him hard on the mouth.

"I can fix that."

**A/N: Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing! Sorry for the excruciating wait guys, but real life is extremely busy and I really have like no time to update at all or write, or even go online!**


	65. Veil

**Veil**

He's falling, falling, falling.

He can hear Bella's cackle and see the horror on Harry's face, but he's not thinking of any of that.

He's tried, tried to live life without James, and Remus, and Peter—the way they _used _to be—_The Marauders_—but he can't.

Nothing is the same since they've left Hogwarts, and it's been so long since he's truly laughed.

He feels the fabric brush against him, and he laughs; the mocking laugh he was so famous for at Hogwarts, because now he's finally free, no longer caged.

**A/N: I find this one somewhat similar to **Azkaban**, but it's something to post. Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing! **


	66. Regret

**Regret**

He can feel the burning in his eyes and the ache in his heart as he watches her walk away with Michael Walsh.

He knows he should just get over her already; after all, it has been nearly seven years.

He wants to—he really wants to get over her and have a healthy relationship with a nice girl, but deep down he knows she's the only one for him.

He tries; he really does, to get over her, but after focussing so much attention on her, he doesn't know how he could possibly forget her.

Three months into his somewhat healthy relationship with Emily Boxwood, he finds _her _in the common room alone. It's been ages since he's been alone with her—nearly four months—because he's too afraid of what he might do.

He finds it hard to swallow, his mouth has gone dry, and he doesn't know what to say to her—after all, avoiding someone really can ruin a friendship—if it could even have been called that.

He starts out with a simple 'hey, Lily' and from there he finds it's quite effortless.

The clock on the mantle chimes midnight, startling them out of their conversation. It's been nearly three hours that they've been speaking and he finds he's missed her company more than anything.

She says goodnight, and as he watches her go to her room, he sighs, thinking he really should have kissed her.

**A/N: Hey guys! God, it's been forever, hasn't it? Thank you to **_MyMelo _**for taking time out of her busy schedule to beta! :D**


	67. Regret Part II

**A/N: Hey guys, updates definitely won't be frequent. College ended last week and I work from 7-12 and then 1-5 everyday so that cuts down on my fanfiction time. I will post when I can! Thanks for reading!**

**Regret Part II**

It's a Saturday when she accepts a date to Hogsmeade with Michael Walsh.

She's elated when she and James become friends and he starts dating Emily, after all, he deserves to be happy too.

But then, something changes—James no longer seeks her out—and she finds it nearly impossible to find him in the castle. She resorts to talking to Sirius, Remus and Peter to relay her messages to him.

It's been three months since he's actually appeared in her presence in the Heads common room and she smiles, her eyes sparkling at him—and then she notices him hesitate. There is silence and then he says 'Hey, Lily.' As if they've been speaking regularly for the past three months.

The clock chimes on the mantle and she starts, realizing how much time has passed effortlessly between them.

She says goodnight and makes her way to her room, and when she flops onto her four poster bed, she realizes just how much she's missed him.

**A/N: It's not really regret on Lily's part, but I wanted you all to know that this chapter and the previous one go together. Thanks to** _MyMelo_ **as always for beta-ing!**


	68. Touch

**Touch**

She hates him. How many times has she told him not to touch her? She hates the feel of his warm arm wrapped around her waist. Doesn't he know she wants to jump him when he does?

When he whispers in her ear and his deep voice reverberates through her body causing goose bumps; his suggestive tones when he asks her what she wants him to help her with.

She's leaving the library on the way to the Gryffindor common room, when she bumps into someone.

Her bag falls from her grasp and she feels flames creep up her arm where it made contact with the other person.

"Sorry, I should've been watching where I was going." She says, apologizing, eyes still on the contents of her bag.

She hears a deep chuckle, then;

"You should watch where you're going, Evans."

She turns, emerald orbs alight, as they take in the sight before her. His hazel eyes are mocking, hair windswept as ever, and that smirk painted on his lips.

"If you wanted to touch me, all you had to do is ask."

Before she can even make a retort, his soft lips are on her cheek, and then he's gone. She stands there for some time, comprehending what just happened, turning in the opposite direction towards the Astronomy tower to think.

Around the corner, James smiles, thinking that with a few more episodes like that, she'll soon be his.

**A/N: Thanks to MyMelo for betaing!**


	69. Curiosity

**Curiosity**

She doesn't know what it is, but something about Sirius Black fascinates her. So, when he approaches her later that day, and asks her to go to Hogsmeade with him the next day, she's surprised, but agrees.

Sometime later, James Potter approaches her and asks her to go with him. He's asking politely, and if she wasn't going with Sirius she would say yes.

"I'm sorry, I can't."

His eyes are dark behind his wire-rimmed glasses.

"Can't or won't, Lily." He says, harshly.

"Can't—I've already said yes to someone else, sorry."

She really is sorry, but how can you explain to the guy that has fancied you for ages that you're going to Hogsmeade with his best mate?

He nods, turning away, and makes his way back the way he came from. He doesn't see the regret on her face.

The next morning she makes her way down to the entrance hall to meet Sirius.

"Ready to go?" he asks her, grabbing her hand.

"Yes."

They make their way to the Three Broomsticks for butterbeers and chat amicably about classes and their mates.

"Speaking of mates," continues Sirius, "here come mine now."

"Padfoot! We've been looking everywhere for you mate," says James, waving his arms about excitedly. She smiles at his antics and at how his hazel eyes glow a molten gold when he's happy. "You should've seen—" he stops when his eyes meet hers, shock and hurt written across his features, his eyes now dark, without their sparkle.

His hand flies to his hair, his face anguished and he spins on his heels and leaves the Three Broomsticks slamming the door on the way out.

Remus breaks the silence, his pale blue eyes burning as they look at Sirius.

"I told you not to. I told you he'd take it the wrong way, but you just _had_ to go through with it didn't you?"

"Remus, what are you talking about?" she asks, confused at their exchange.

He looks at her, sighing, and says,

"Sirius asked you here so that he could convince you to go out with James, even if it's just once, but he failed to mention it to James."

"Bugger!" she says, jumping from her chair, grabbing her cloak and racing out the door.

She's trudging through the snow, frantically trying to think of an explanation when out of thin air a hand grabs her and she's pushed against the cold stone wall of Madame Malkins.

"What—"

There he is, in front of her, looking hurt and hopeful at the same time. When he speaks, his voice is quiet.

"Lily, if you wanted to date Sirius you could have just told me. I'd stay out of your way, I promise."

"He asked me before you did, James; he didn't really want to anyways, he was trying to convince me to go out with you."

He's looking sheepish now, and she can't help but smile.

"So, how about a Butterbeer?"

He grins and agrees, as she grabs his hand, leading the way back to the Three Broomsticks.

**A/N: It's been ages, I know. I've been so busy with work I haven't had the time to write, but it's snowing and it's gotten me into the writing mood again! Hopefully it continues! Thank you to MyMelo for betaing!**


	70. Inferno

**Inferno**

His eyes are blazing as you accuse him of being jealous of Snape. You've had this row many times, but this time you can see through his anger and confusion. His hazel eyes are no longer molten gold as he looks at you, but dark, almost black, the twinkle absent.

You stand there, in the deserted corridor taking each other in. His teeth are clenched and you can hear his heavy breathing in the silence.

As angry as you are at each other, you can sense that this is right, because you are Lily and he is James, and this is how it's supposed to be.

He tangles his hand in his hair, clenching it into a fist, and closes his eyes.

When he opens them again, something in their depths has shifted and before you can comprehend what, he breaks the silence.

"Right, well, if you're done, I have Quidditch."

His quiet rumble echoes through the corridor and you wonder where the usual blaze of your arguments has gone. He _can't _walk away yet, he's not supposed to just _leave_ like that!

You watch as he turns on his heel and makes his way away from you. Your feet are rooted to the spot, but you can't let him leave—not when you feel frustrated with the way this turned out. What happened to the usual blaze and hexes in the corridor?

You're numb and everything is a blur, until you find his warm hand in yours, and he's spinning around in confusion at this new development. Before you or he knows what's going on, you find your mouth on his, his lips soft against your own.

He pulls away, and when you look in his eyes, you see the inferno. This time though, it's not a blaze of anger, but of love.

**A/N: Thanks to MyMelo for betaing! This will be my Christmas present to all of you wonderful reviewers! Merry Christmas!**


	71. Whisper

**Whisper**

She's sitting in the back of the Potions class beside Remus, because she was late.

She's never late, but today isn't like any other day, because today, James Potter is whispering in Marlene McKinnon's ear.

She can see them from her spot at the back of the class and she can hear his quiet rumble of laughter as Marlene leans towards him, resting her hand on his arm.

"Er—Lily, are you alright?" asks Remus tentatively, warily eyeing her clenched fists.

"Fine, just fine, I'll get the ingredients, shall I?" She abruptly gets up from her seat and makes her way past the giggling pair towards the ingredient room.

She's browsing the shelves for a bezoar when she feels a presence behind her. She turns to see him looking at her, his hazel eyes boring into hers behind his wire-rimmed glasses. He's leaning against the doorframe watching her and she almost drops a vile of armadillo bile.

"It's not what you think."

His deep baritone breaks the silence, and she grinds her teeth at his assumption that she _cares_ what he's doing with Marlene.

"And what _do_ I think, _Potter_?"

She sees him flinch at the use of his surname and for a moment she thinks he'll leave her alone. Instead, he steps closer, and she can feel his chest millimetres from her back, the heat of his body penetrating her personal space. She can feel his breath near her ear and she hopes he can't see the goose bumps break out on her arms.

"I think," he says, pausing. She can feel his smirk as his eyes rove over her face, pausing at her lips. "I think, that you think I'm shagging her. Not only that, but I think you're _jealous_."

She scoffs, turning to face him so fast his face almost becomes a blur.

"_As if!"_

His smirk is getting wider and his mouth is getting closer, and his lips are centimetres away from hers.

"C'mon, Evans, just admit it—you want me. You want to know what it's like to be _under _me."

She's angry, and blazing and she wants to hurt him so badly, but after so long, all she really wants it to know what it's like to _be_ with James Potter.

His lips are almost touching hers, when she whispers,

"Fuck you."

The next thing she knows is James' lips on hers, and her back being shoved against the shelves. Her mind is a haze and all she knows is that no boy in Hogwarts has _anything _on James Potter.

He pulls away, their heavy breathing the only sound in the enclosed space. The door opens and in steps Amos Diggory. He pauses, seeing her dishevelled appearance and proximity to James, and the next thing she knows he's yelled out,

"Oi, Evans and Potter are snogging in the ingredients room!"

"Bugger," She mutters, but can't really come to care, once James' lips are back on hers.

**A/N: Thanks so much to **_MyMelo_** for betaing! **


	72. Blur

**Blur**

His hands are cupping her breasts, her back pressed against the cool stone wall; a beautiful contrast against her burning skin.

Her breath is coming in pants as he moves further down her body, and when he reaches the waistband of her knickers, she whimpers. Does he know he's driving her insane? She can feel him waiting patiently, and she knows what he's waiting for.

She opens her eyes and his breath catches in his throat. This is what he loves most about sex with Lily; how her emerald green eyes become hazy—the colour of ivy.

She's never told him, but when he looks at her like that, she comes close to telling him she loves him. His eyes become a molten gold, and although everything else becomes a blur, his eyes are constant.

He won't tell her; She'll run, he knows this, so he keeps those words inside and puts them into his actions; I love you.

She doesn't know when the lines began to blur, but really, she finds she doesn't care.

**A/N: A huge thank you to** _MyMelo_ **for betaing!**


	73. Thestral

**Thestral**

He's elated, the day he gets off the Hogwarts Express in his seventh year.

His mates are in tow; Lily is his fellow Head and they had gotten on splendidly.

There is a slight breeze in the air and he closes his eyes, taking a deep breath, thinking he might go for a fly after the feast.

When he opens his hazel eyes, a flash of red catches his eye and he can't help the smile that graces his features. The same smile is quickly erased when he sees she's not smiling.

She's gazing at the horseless carriages in horror, and that's when he realizes she's never seen the thestrals before.

He tells his mates to go on ahead and he approaches her carefully.

"It doesn't seem as magical as it did before, now that you can see them." He says.

She starts, breaking from her trance and gives him a sad smile.

"Have you seen them before then?"

He nods, "My grandfather died summer before third year."

"I'm sorry."

He's never known what to say in times like these, so he pauses before saying, "Would you like to join me—er—us for the feast?"

She's silent for a moment and his temperature is rising.

"It's okay if you don't—I just thought—"

"No, I'd love to James, thank you. You don't mind if Mary and Alice join us?"

He smiles, elated that she's accepted his offer.

"Of course not, the more the merrier!"

He helps her into the carriage and as they lurch forward on their way to the castle she reaches for his hand and squeezes it lightly.

It's not until they walk into the Great Hall for the feast that he realizes she hasn't let go.


	74. Envy

**Envy**

She knows James envies her friendship with Severus. There's never been any doubt about the dislike the two have for each other.

Every time she comes across the two of them in a duel she lets each of them know in their own way that she is disappointed in them.

For James, she uses his surname to cut him down a notch and tells him she hates him, so her true feelings for him don't show.

Severus is different—she talks to him quietly in the library asking him why he bothers duelling. He always gives her the same reply: _"Potter needs to be put in his place."_ But she can see through him—or rather, both of them—she is the cause of their hate, or at least part of it.

So the winter of sixth year when she James are on friendly terms and he asks her why she wanted to be his Potions partner, she tells him she's better at making friends while brewing and that they'd better stay after class because she has a few years to catch up on.

**A/N: Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing!**


	75. Frozen

**Frozen**

She's elated. She shouldn't be; after all, she's just been dumped by Amos Diggory. She doesn't seem to care though, even as whispers follow her to the Heads dorm.

If asked, she wouldn't say, but she's looking for James. She has something important to say and it can't wait. She revels in the fact that so much has changed between the two of them, and hopefully today she can tip the scales just that tiny bit further.

She's through the portrait and approaching the door to his room, not pausing to knock, remembering him telling her to "come right in, there's no need to knock". Today though, she faintly thinks she should have.

"Jam—"

Her words fade away at the scene in front of her. His gorgeous bronzed back and broad shoulders are visible from under the Gryffindor Red sheets; muscles rippling as his body rocks, deep moans reverberating through the room, along with heavy panting and lustful sighs emitting from the girl underneath him.

"Lily?"

His eyes capture hers and she snaps out of her daze.

"I—I'm sorry—I should have knocked." She blurts, shaking her head and running from the room.

-x-

She's sitting in the arm chair in their common room the next morning, her mind thinking furiously. _How could she have been so stupid? As if James would have waited for her! He's her best friend for Merlin's sake!_

"Lily?"

Her head snaps up, her cheeks flushing as her emerald orbs meet his hazel ones.

"Listen, about yesterday, I—I thought you were with Diggory—I didn't think you'd be back so soon—"

"Oh, so that makes it okay?" She cuts in, shouting furiously.

"Listen Lily," He sighs, "I won't argue with you. D'you want to come down to the lake? Remus will be studying for Arithmancy."

"I'd rather not, maybe you can ask your new _friend_." She answers venomously, stalking out of the room.

-x-

He sighs, watching her go. He makes his way to the tree by the lake where his mates are waiting.

"Where's Evans?" Asks Sirius frowning. "This is the first time she hasn't been around in months!"

He runs his hands through his hair, a nervous habit more than anything, relating the events of the previous night and Lily's anger only a few short minutes ago.

"Prongs mate, are you daft?" asks Remus shaking his head. "She bloody fancies you!"

"Moony, there's no—"

"Oi, we're going to be late for Minnie's class." Interrupts Sirius, getting to his feet.

"Padfoot, since when do you care about being late?"

Sirius grins, "Since dear Prongs here is partners with Evans."

-x-

She's about to let out a sigh of relief when she realizes the Marauders haven't shown up (despite McGonagall's threats of locking them out of the lesson the next time they are late), when in they rush, just as the bells goes, her sigh of relief turning into one of despair.

Before last night she would have loved to have James as her partner. They are—_were_—best friends after all.

"Saved by the bell." Says McGonagall crisply, eyeing each of the Marauders with a stern look as James plops into the seat beside her.

"Today we will be Transfiguring toads into teaspoons. I find revising the simplest of Transfigurations can help with learning much more complex transfigurations such as human Transfiguration which we will begin later in the week. Begin."

"Lily,"

"Bugger off."

"Lily, I didn't—you just came in—"

"Next time lock the bloody door!" she shouts. "No one needs to see you shagging like a rabbit!"

"Miss Evans!"

"Oi, I'm not the one who burst in without knocking! Maybe if you weren't such a prude!"

"Mr Potter!"

"I am not a prude! I was coming to tell you Amos dumped me and that I fancy you, you bloody git!"

She is aware of all the eyes in the room on their table, her heavy breathing the only sound in the room.

"You—Amos—what?"

" . .Bloody—"

Before she can utter the word 'git', James' lips are on hers and cheers break out across the room.

"Mr Potter, Miss Evans, you are dismissed!"

"But professor—" she starts, shocked that she's being removed from class.

"Perhaps you'll be more attentive in my class once Mr Potter and yourself have settled your—ah, differences, or similarities, rather."

She can feel her cheeks burn as James grabs her hand, leading her out of the room, Sirius' voice following in their wake.

"Don't forget to lock the door, mate!"

**A/N: Thanks to **_MyMelo_** for betaing! **


	76. Unattainable

**Unattainable **

Every little thing reminds her of him, and in the end, she always ends up dreaming of him. Of the way he looked-the way her breath used to catch in her throat. If she's honest, her breath still catches at the thought of him.

Her dreams feel so real; like he's there in front of her-like no time has passed at all and she's still fifteen and has all the time in the world.

She hasn't seen him in years; he's vanished, much like the vanishing cabinets hidden somewhere within Hogwarts.

She thought she had all the time in the world with him; with that smile, those eyes. It's far too late now, and she regrets not telling him how she felt.

She remembers the day his shirt rode up just that tiny bit and she caught a glimpse of his hip. Just that tiny piece of exposed skin caused such a loss of breath, such _desire_. She still sees him standing at the end of the corridor between classes with his mates.

She's at Florean Fortescue's when she hears a male voice asking for a Chocolate Frog Sundae. Her head whips around searching, hoping and at the same time dreading that it's him. Her eyes land on someone with messy raven hair a few inches shorter than he would be, and yet she still can't tear her eyes away until she knows it's not him.

He turns and his eyes are blue, not hazel, his hair doesn't look so raven in the sun, and his mouth isn't James' at all. She shakes her head, rising from her seat, telling herself to stop thinking about him, that he no longer matters.

She knows it's a lie.


	77. Butter

**Butter**

The day she realizes the way he is in her mind is completely different than the specimen staring back at her from the photo in the Daily Prophet, she wonders where the time has gone.

She wants to go back, back to the way they were. Back to when he was hers. Or at least she pretended he was.

It's been three years since she last saw him; last spoke to him.

She thinks of multiple scenarios where she could approach him, tell him how she feels, but those thoughts come from the groggy moment before sleep is wiped from her eyes, the morning sun filtering through her window.

If it ever came down to it, her heart would race, panic choking her, and the only thought in her mind would be how gorgeous he is and how much she wishes the plain girl next to him was her.

The girl he's with is mousy, eyebrows nearly non-existent, smile too wide, eyes too big, hair straight and boring.

Her curls, she thinks, are so much better, her crooked smile, almond-shaped eyes, all so much more thrilling.

He will always be out of reach, slipping through her grasp; much like butter.


	78. Photograph

**Photograph **

She's not good enough for you. Her eyes are too far apart, smile too thin, hair too straight.

The photo in _The Daily Prophet_ that morning catches my eye, catching me off guard. Your arm is wrapped around her; you have a half-drunk firewhiskey in your hand. I take in your hazel eyes, shining with happiness, your muddy Quidditch gear from the match you just played, and your Adam's apple protruding, making my heart ache with _desire_.

As I stare at the photo; your features are dragging me in, pulling me back into chances I had, memories I don't want to relive...If only I still had that time-turner.

When I arrive at St. Mungo's and Mary asks if I saw the photo I lash out, telling her I hate you, when all I want is you. Alice never fails to keep me updated on your life and I hate her for reminding me of you, but at the same time it's _never enough_. I want to know more; I want to know _everything_ about you, from the way your stubble feels under my fingers, the way your lips would feel against mine, to hear your laugh every day, how it would feel to have your arm wrapped around me instead, how your arousal feels and the sounds you make.

The sick longing feeling lasts all day, into the night, and when I lay my head on my pillow I push the thought of you and her together out of my mind, hoping that I don't dream of you...because if I do, the cycle will start again tomorrow, only this time, all I will see are your eyes.


End file.
